What Do I Have To Say
I just watched The Vamps on Capital Fm. It was funny, they are funny. And guess what? There is again one cutie on the band. For me it is Bradley William Simpson. He is cute and funny. And far, far away from me.
What makes him cute? What makes guys cute at all? Everything - the hair, the looks, the way they talk, the smile, the things they say even if they are totally senseless.
Anyway, that is not what I really want to blog about right now. What I am thinking about? The first thing that comes in my head right now is my step-father. Do you know that feeling when mom/dad wants you to like your step-father/mother? I know and I hate it!
Because I do not like my step-father. Years passing by I want to meet my real dad again. And this feeling grows even bigger although I do not know if that will ever happen. i do not know where he is. Well, almost. I have a clue but that does not help because I have no full information and so on and on. I just keep dreaming because that is all I can do.
But my step-father - he used to be okay. But know he is turned into walking bag of alcohol. I just can not stand him anymore although I try but not for him. I do it for my mom. And because I hate being lectured about the thing that I forget to say "Hi!" or "Good morning" to him. It hurts me when she lectures me to treat him good. I try but no one sees that.
I do not like him and I just do not understand why she wants me to like him. It is insane because I do not think he really cares about me.
Okay now I just gonna do something because I don't think I will be able to sleep yet.